POEM - With Friends Like You

The pamphlet sitting in the rack

In the grocery store vestibule

Next to the brochure

For Cat Fancy magazine

Was new and irresistible

STOP BED WETTING NOW!

Broadcast the thick black type

Across the bright yellow paper

I snatched up the prize

Leafed through and found

To my great pleasure

A mail-in interest card

Which of course I would be filling out

Not with my name

But with that of a good friend

Whomever came to mind first

It’s what I do for my friends

To let them know they are special

Just ask Robby about it

If you can distract him

From making out with your mom!

He loves you mother

In all the wrong ways

This point is a confession

I learned it from my mother

I don’t spend a lot of energy

Trying to exact revenge

If I don’t like you

I ignore you

Of course if I like you

I might just pester you

So that your fondest wish

Would be that I didn’t like you

Quite so much

Don’t be dismayed

By your complimentary copy

Of Incontinence Today

When it arrives in 6 to 8 weeks

It’s just a little love note

            Along with the free Depends sample

To show I’m thinking of you

And that I care deeply

About your bladder control