Destruction
of property
Occurred
early in the day
Without
benefit
Or
assistance
Of
any illicit substances
Of
all the homes
In all of this neighborhood
Where large amounts of alcohol
Would be ingested
And many idiotic things would be done
The initiator was this guy
I shook it off just in time
To walk into the kitchen
And nearly slip
On a unfortunately placed
Banana peel
A cliché just waiting
Hoping beyond hope
That the guy
Who put his head
Right through the porch
Would make it a twofer
Of pratfall hilarity
In the evening
It was time to cart kids
To parties and fun
Whilst I was destined to sit and wait
Count the time
To drag my weary, wounded carcass
Out into the dawn of a new year
My oldest only lasted thirty minutes
At the party the rednecks threw
I waited, anticipating his departure
Watched as the aerial rockets
Went lateral more often than was
reasonable
All of them getting in as many as they
could
“Before Obama takes ‘em away”
Oh brother!
But after what I’ve seen tonight
He probably should take them away
At least from you
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